Random Thoughts

Friday, September 29, 2006

Take a trip on the bitter bus

Ok, so I was going to post this deep and meaningful sentiment about how we should be thankful for what we have because so many people have so little, and I still feel that way, but I have something else to say.

Why, in the name of all that is holy and good, is everyone on the planet getting married? I realize that all people go through that point in their life when most people their age are getting married and starting families, but come on! So many of us are still in school, not even sure where we'll be in a few years. Is it wise to commit to someone who may ask you to move far away from where you would like to be? Yes, yes, loving someone means making sacrifices, but practicality must come in somewhere. If two people have similar careers, I see how it would be a little easier to do, but what if you don't? What if your career is specific and requires you to be in a certain place? What if that's the case for both of you?

Now, that said, I am more than a little bit jealous. I thought that I would be married by now and that everything would work itself out. I too had that amazing amount of faith that it would be smooth sailing and that we would both be happy where ever we ended up. Granted, I wasn't really going to be the one sacrificing. And now here I sit, bitter little Cynthia, watching everyone pair off and begin potentially very happy lives, with a few exceptions of course. And I wonder, what would have happened if I had joined the ranks of the "off the market?" Would I be happy? Would I still be in grad school? Would it matter? So on, and so forth. Yada yada.

It's like an infection, pardon the professional indulgence. I must be immune, sad as that is. Or at least immunized, which is different. I've always been very healthy, minus the two surgeries which don't count as bad health, so maybe I can't get "love sick" anymore. Maybe the marriage bug has passed me by, or I'm just a carrier (as if that wasn't the story of my life!).

Now, I am very happy for my friends and family that are married. Good for you. And those who are planning weddings or hoping to be soon, congrats. I'll come with bells on and dance at your respective weddings (that's a shout out to Grandma Charlotte). But chances are I will be a little more bitter as I leave than when I came. So, for my sake, please invite some nice single men to the wedding just in case. ;)


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